It’s kinda boring u know…..
during cny…. no hometown to go to this year…..
so stone everyday… either at grandma house or at home….
eat and sleep then wake up eat then sleep again……
really the year of pig…..
i’m sure everyone is having fun….. not like me so dead….
the best part i ever had is being scared by a frog…..
i screamed, jumped and hopped all the way from my door entrance to my living room… then ended up standing on the chair holding my shoe…..
my sis and bro was laughing at me…..
one thing i don’t understand is that a frog will always appear infront of me….
everywhere i go…. when i got down from the car…. it will sure be there….
it’s scary u know…. plus it’s chinese new year… and that’s the gift i get!!! Gosh!
homework….. bye bye…. i really don’t hv the mood doing it….
though i was opening it infront of me…..
but i just open it up….. and i end up staring at it….
sigh…. will i ever finish it? it seems so hard…..
want to call ppl chit chat also dunno call who cause everyone is back a hometown….
so better not disturb their time at hometown as it’s only once a year trip……
xy now lagi no need say…..felt like messaging u  but never had the guts to do it….. but then just a minute a go we were still ok chatting away…..
the next minute… i got a message saying that…. i’m the enemy now……
what have i done lar? betrayer some more….. i don’t betray my friends excuse me!!!! i don’t….. not even to u…. i’m sorry k…. i will wait till the day u forgive me…. but i really didn’t do hw…. i just stare at it….
if u consider that doing hw….. than i’m speechless…
i suppose u really hate me that much…..
a lot more than i expected right?
i thought i could share feelings with u…..
someone that i could trust…..
so i think my behavior has irritate u…..
is it true?…. can i know?….

ever since that day…..
my heart has stop…..
no more feeling….
gone to no where…..
out of my control…..
don’t know where it has went….
my unconscious part of my mind…..
has to stop together with my heart….
i don’t know why…..
nothing seems to be under my control….
i no longer feel for anything…..
it is always refreshing my past…..
my thoughts and feeling are lingering there….
nothing seems to be in the present…..
so lost…..now…..
wishing someone would find it back for me…..
bringing me back to where i am now…..
bringing me back to what i am suppose to do now…..
hoping i will one day be noticing what i’m doing now…..
maybe i need to do this myself……
maybe i need someone to make me realise…..
maybe i need a slap form someone…..
just to wake me up…..

i don’t understand why……
why is everyone treating me this way?
even my brother!!!!!
i said sorry right….
i meant it when i say so….
the very bottom of my heart….
i thought i’m ur sister….
i thought u were my brother….
then why can’t u forgive me?…..
i did nothing serious right……
nothing at all…
why even a million times of sorry makes no different?
why even being ur slave for a day makes no different?
why treating for anything u want makes no different?
why wishing u a happy chinese new year also u don’t want to accept…?
why why why?…..
do u really want me to have sleepless night every single night?
do u really hate me that much?
do u?…..
why must u force me into that only u will forgive me?
there’s so many things i can do…. but why must it be that?
that’s something so lame that i will never ever want to do it…..
i don’t care how u force me….. i won’t do it…..
but i want ur forgiveness…..
how now?

i wanna thanks those who cared for me……
really tq k……
u guys encouraged me a lot….. tqtq!!!!!
though i always in silent mood…. vibrator….
but…. my ears are always open…..
hearing everything….
not overhear a…..!!!!
just thanks k….
anything u all can always count on me…..
hehe…..

wish u all early Happy Valentine first o….
u can also enjoy though single…..
it’s not just a day for couples….
but also friends ya…..
so don’t feel left out o…..
and Happy Chinese New Year!!!!!!
don’t forget my ang pao….
wish u all good health and long live ya…
i want extra…. haha….
love you guys…..

Rascal Flatts - What hurts the most….
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house, that don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry
Every once in a while even though goin on with you gone still upsets me
There are days
Every now and again i pretend i’m okay but that’s not what gets me

What hurts the most, was being so close
And having so much to say
And watchin you walk away
Never knowing, what could have been
And not seein that lovin you
Is what i was tryin to do

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere i go
But i’m doin it
It’s hard to force that smile when i see our old friends and i’m alone
Still harder gettin up, gettin dressed, livin with this regret
But i know if i could do it over
I would trade, give away all the words that i saved in my heart that i left unspoken

What hurts the most, is being so close
And having so much to say
And watchin you walk away
Never knowing, what could have been
And not seein that lovin you
Is what i was tryin to do

What hurts the most, was being so close
And having so much to say
And watchin you walk away
And never knowing, what could have been
And not seein that lovin you
Is what i was tryin to do

not seein that lovin you
that

…. isn’t this song so nice?
Alicia…. haha….. want to sing some more?….
sing for me k….?